I finished today's run as written: 5 minute walk/10 minute run/3 minute walk/10 minute run, but I don't feel pride or accomplishment or relief. I feel fat and slow and like I could be doing permanent long term damage to my knees. I haven't lost any weight since I've started, and my running pace hasn't gotten any faster. I'm running slower than most people walk. Part of me thinks that even if I quit today, I wouldn't be disappointed in myself since I feel like this whole program is not worth it anyway.
I'm not fond of this post, but I'm leaving it in anyway because I said I'd blog honestly about each and every run. Here's to hoping the 25 minute run on W6D3 will be awe-inspiring.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Week 6, Day 1: Redemption
Today was attempt #2 at Week 6, Day 1. I did it, but I sorta cheated, but also possibly made it harder than it was supposed to be. The workout called for a nice symmetrical pyramid of 5run/3walk/8run/3walk/5run. I did the 5run/3walk but then stretched the 8run into 12run, but skipped the second 3min walk. Basically, in the middle of the workout, I decided I wanted to just go home, so I ran all the way. I finished 4 minutes shy of what was supposed to be the total time, but 3 of those 4 minutes were walking minutes. It's not really worth debating if this is "ok" or not. I did it, I'm counting it as a completed workout, and I'm moving on. I don't know why I sound so defensive right now.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Week 6, Day 1: Pity Party for 1
Today sucked. I was supposed to do 5 run/3 walk/8 run/3 walk/5 run, and instead I did 4 run/20 walk. I felt fine physically, but mentally I had a lot of self-doubt going on. I was disappointed in myself for something else (I don't even remember what it was) so somehow decided that I should rob myself of any kind of personal acheivement. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find a shrink.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Week 5, Day 3: Don't Stop Believin'
I DID IT! The 20-minute uninterrupted run! I did it, I did it, I DID IT!!!!!
Just like Jan, and Nike, and everyone on the C25K program says, you just do it. My legs felt exactly like they did on the W5D2 workout, and that is, SORE. After the first 5-8 minutes of running, I really wanted a walk break, but I knew it wasn't an option, so I just kept on going. I also knew from W5D2 that at 18 minutes, I felt like I got my second wind. Of course, that was after a 5 minute walk break, but it didn't matter. I told myself today that once I got to 18 minutes, then it would be easy. And it was, sorta. My legs felt better and the urge to walk was greatly diminished. Plus, the last half mile of my route is a gentle down hill. It's also remarkable that no matter what song comes on my ipod at this point, it's always the BEST SONG to run to. Today it was Journey's Don't Stop Believin'. Oh my god, all of a sudden I was powered with piss & vinegar, and a whole lot of cheese (not like cheddar, but like, 80's hair band cheese.) For that last half mile, I had a stupid grin on my face, and I may have even high fived myself at one point. I finished my loop in 25:29, which means I ran 29 seconds more than I needed to, and honestly I felt like I could have run for another couple of minutes, or at least until the Journey song ended and John Denver's Sunshine on my Shoulder started.
YAY me!
Just like Jan, and Nike, and everyone on the C25K program says, you just do it. My legs felt exactly like they did on the W5D2 workout, and that is, SORE. After the first 5-8 minutes of running, I really wanted a walk break, but I knew it wasn't an option, so I just kept on going. I also knew from W5D2 that at 18 minutes, I felt like I got my second wind. Of course, that was after a 5 minute walk break, but it didn't matter. I told myself today that once I got to 18 minutes, then it would be easy. And it was, sorta. My legs felt better and the urge to walk was greatly diminished. Plus, the last half mile of my route is a gentle down hill. It's also remarkable that no matter what song comes on my ipod at this point, it's always the BEST SONG to run to. Today it was Journey's Don't Stop Believin'. Oh my god, all of a sudden I was powered with piss & vinegar, and a whole lot of cheese (not like cheddar, but like, 80's hair band cheese.) For that last half mile, I had a stupid grin on my face, and I may have even high fived myself at one point. I finished my loop in 25:29, which means I ran 29 seconds more than I needed to, and honestly I felt like I could have run for another couple of minutes, or at least until the Journey song ended and John Denver's Sunshine on my Shoulder started.
YAY me!
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Week 5, Day 2: Take Two
I completed Week 5, Day 2 this morning by the book. Lessons have been learned. I didn't drink or smoke yesterday, got a good night's sleep, and went to the bathroom plenty of times this morning before heading out the door. That's so common sensical of me.
The run was good. It was a nice cool day, and it's early enough on a Sunday that I barely saw any cars or people, which I liked. I added on 1/10th of a mile by going up a different street in the middle of my loop and then connecting back to my regular route, which was perfect because I ended at my driveway just as the stopwatch clicked 26:00. So my loop is 1.7 miles, and that includes the 5 minutes of walking. I've had this conversation with myself before... the distance really isn't long enough. Tomorrow's 20 minute uninterupted run is noted on the C25K program as 2 miles or 20 minutes. For me, it'll be more like 1.3 miles, or 20 minutes. Which is fine, I suppose, except the program is called C25K not C230minutes of running. Oh well, I can worry about that later.
Some boring details about today's run: the first 8 minutes of running really hurt my legs. I (felt like I) was carrying around 250 pounds of booze-drinking, fast-food eating, cigarette-smoking sloth. The second 8 minutes, though, that was good. My legs felt better, I actually felt like I was running faster, and I was even having visions of me running in a 5K race with people cheering me on. I love these endorphin-inspired visions. It usually involves me doing something impressive, like running, and my ex-boyfriend or some snob that I hated in high school is inevitably standing on the sidelines with jaw dropped, in total disbelief that I'm so awesome now. And then they read this blog and realize, Nope! She's still just a fat loser!
Speaking of a 5K race, I might do one tomorrow morning. I know, I know, I'm 4 weeks early. But I think I'll try to do my 20 minute uninterrupted run and then just walk the rest, or I'll walk the first mile and try to run the rest. We'll have to wait and see.
The run was good. It was a nice cool day, and it's early enough on a Sunday that I barely saw any cars or people, which I liked. I added on 1/10th of a mile by going up a different street in the middle of my loop and then connecting back to my regular route, which was perfect because I ended at my driveway just as the stopwatch clicked 26:00. So my loop is 1.7 miles, and that includes the 5 minutes of walking. I've had this conversation with myself before... the distance really isn't long enough. Tomorrow's 20 minute uninterupted run is noted on the C25K program as 2 miles or 20 minutes. For me, it'll be more like 1.3 miles, or 20 minutes. Which is fine, I suppose, except the program is called C25K not C230minutes of running. Oh well, I can worry about that later.
Some boring details about today's run: the first 8 minutes of running really hurt my legs. I (felt like I) was carrying around 250 pounds of booze-drinking, fast-food eating, cigarette-smoking sloth. The second 8 minutes, though, that was good. My legs felt better, I actually felt like I was running faster, and I was even having visions of me running in a 5K race with people cheering me on. I love these endorphin-inspired visions. It usually involves me doing something impressive, like running, and my ex-boyfriend or some snob that I hated in high school is inevitably standing on the sidelines with jaw dropped, in total disbelief that I'm so awesome now. And then they read this blog and realize, Nope! She's still just a fat loser!
Speaking of a 5K race, I might do one tomorrow morning. I know, I know, I'm 4 weeks early. But I think I'll try to do my 20 minute uninterrupted run and then just walk the rest, or I'll walk the first mile and try to run the rest. We'll have to wait and see.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Week 5, Day 2: Lessons Learned
Today's run was going to be really good, but fell short because of a few very preventable reasons. It might be time for a formal Lessons Learned review for me.
Lesson #1: I'm not a drinker. I drink maybe a few times per year. This week, I've consumed alcohol 4 of the last 7 nights. Last night I ordered a martini, which is 100% alcohol. (Ok, so maybe I ended up dumping it into a big red plastic cup that I asked the waiter to fill halfway with Sprite, but still....) Even without getting drunk, trying to get up and run the next morning is hard. Your body just wants to sleep in and eat Devil Dogs for breakfast. More than usual, I mean.
Lesson #2: I don't smoke either. (except when I drink....) I don't really need to elaborate on this one, do I?
Lesson #3: I need to use the bathroom before I start running. I have learned this lesson many, MANY times, but knowing and doing are two different things. Don't get me wrong, I do try! But unfortunately my brain and my colon have about a 10 minute delay in the transfer of information. So today I did my 5 minute warm-up walk, then I was supposed to run for 8 minutes. I ran for 4 minutes, then I had to walk, but not because my legs were sore, or my body was dehydrated from alcohol, or my lungs were weak from the smoking, but because I felt like I was going to shit my pants. I walked for a minute, then ran for another minute or two, then walked the rest of the way to my new BFF, the port-a-potty.
The schedule for today was 8 minutes of running (I did about 5-6 minutes sporadically, with clenched cheeks), then 5 minutes of walking, then 8 minutes of running. Luckily, I made it to the port-a-potty with about 20 seconds left on the 5 minute walking segment. Once my visit was done, I happily ran the last 8 minutes home. I didn't even really notice that I was running for that long. So, damn, today could have been awesome! I'm definitely repeating today's workout before moving on. Partly because I feel like I need to, and partly because I'm scared of the 20-minute uninterrupted run. I'd like to say that I'm getting back on track and will have a great run tomorrow, except I'm going out again tonight with the intent of getting shit-faced. So, Sunday then?
Lesson #1: I'm not a drinker. I drink maybe a few times per year. This week, I've consumed alcohol 4 of the last 7 nights. Last night I ordered a martini, which is 100% alcohol. (Ok, so maybe I ended up dumping it into a big red plastic cup that I asked the waiter to fill halfway with Sprite, but still....) Even without getting drunk, trying to get up and run the next morning is hard. Your body just wants to sleep in and eat Devil Dogs for breakfast. More than usual, I mean.
Lesson #2: I don't smoke either. (except when I drink....) I don't really need to elaborate on this one, do I?
Lesson #3: I need to use the bathroom before I start running. I have learned this lesson many, MANY times, but knowing and doing are two different things. Don't get me wrong, I do try! But unfortunately my brain and my colon have about a 10 minute delay in the transfer of information. So today I did my 5 minute warm-up walk, then I was supposed to run for 8 minutes. I ran for 4 minutes, then I had to walk, but not because my legs were sore, or my body was dehydrated from alcohol, or my lungs were weak from the smoking, but because I felt like I was going to shit my pants. I walked for a minute, then ran for another minute or two, then walked the rest of the way to my new BFF, the port-a-potty.
The schedule for today was 8 minutes of running (I did about 5-6 minutes sporadically, with clenched cheeks), then 5 minutes of walking, then 8 minutes of running. Luckily, I made it to the port-a-potty with about 20 seconds left on the 5 minute walking segment. Once my visit was done, I happily ran the last 8 minutes home. I didn't even really notice that I was running for that long. So, damn, today could have been awesome! I'm definitely repeating today's workout before moving on. Partly because I feel like I need to, and partly because I'm scared of the 20-minute uninterrupted run. I'd like to say that I'm getting back on track and will have a great run tomorrow, except I'm going out again tonight with the intent of getting shit-faced. So, Sunday then?
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Week 5, Day 1: Sweet Relief
After last week's botched run on day 3, I was wondering if I'd start week 5 or repeat week 4. I decided that my mind isn't allowed to hold me back, only my body is. So I started week 5 today knowing that if it was too much, then I'd back off and repeat week 4 if I needed to. I really liked the simplicity of today's workout. Alternating 5 minutes of running with 3 minutes of walking for a total of 21 minutes. I finally felt like what I did could be considered running. 5 minutes is just long enough to get into a groove. My legs didn't hurt as much as they did last week during the 5 minute segment, which is even more impressive when you consider that I did three 5-minute segments today.
But actually, that's not entirely true. Something interesting happened during the middle of my run, interupting my second 5-minute running segment. It was a very remarkable sight. The sky opened and the earth shook, and I couldn't believe my eyes. The padlock on the port-a-potty was NOT THERE! And! And! There was TOILET PAPER in the port-a-potty! Man, there is nothing better than a good bathroom break.
Back to negative thoughts and self-doubt -- this is the first week where every workout gets progressively harder. I may have mentioned that the 3rd workout this week is a 20-minute uninterrupted run. I'm going to try to complete each workout as is, and if I can't do it, I'll repeat it until I can. Hey, that wasn't really negative or self-doubting. That's progress.
But actually, that's not entirely true. Something interesting happened during the middle of my run, interupting my second 5-minute running segment. It was a very remarkable sight. The sky opened and the earth shook, and I couldn't believe my eyes. The padlock on the port-a-potty was NOT THERE! And! And! There was TOILET PAPER in the port-a-potty! Man, there is nothing better than a good bathroom break.
Back to negative thoughts and self-doubt -- this is the first week where every workout gets progressively harder. I may have mentioned that the 3rd workout this week is a 20-minute uninterrupted run. I'm going to try to complete each workout as is, and if I can't do it, I'll repeat it until I can. Hey, that wasn't really negative or self-doubting. That's progress.
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